LeliaThomas.Com

Burning in MySpace Hell

If the virtual universe of the Internet has any sense of spirituality, it must surely consider MySpace its Hell. I know I consider it the Hell of the Internet. All around you is bad design, endless and needless errors, and a plethora of ever-vocal, horny, zit-faced teenagers whining about how hard their lives are and how they want to “end it all.” (Please join me in saying to them: “We could use a few less stupid people on this hunk of rock.”) The amazing thing is that while I have always, always, always, always, always hated MySpace, I loathe it even more since having to take it apart.

Looking under the hood of this website is like staring Arrogance in the eye. When I look at MySpace, this is what it says to me:

HI, I AM MYSPACE. WOULD YOU LIEK TO SIGN UP WITH ME? AND INVITE YOUR FRIENDS??? I am existing to make money off of you, which you’re okay with, but I’m ALSO going to do it while being poorly designed, filled with errors and generally giving you a “fuck you” attitude at every turn. SIGN UP NOW, PLZ. INVITE UR FRIENDS 2. NOW!!!1!1!

So I try to sign up, and meanwhile I get a bastard CAPTCHA, a pretty well impotent and highly UN-user-friendly countermeasure to spam. Now, nearly 30 minutes after I’ve re-signed up to Hell, I’ve yet to receive my verification email. That should not be a difficult procedure for the site to carry out. It should be automated.

Of course, these are things I’ve complained about before–nearly a year ago, in fact. It’s nice to see MySpace believes in improvement. Like an alcoholic going to AA meetings and downing a bottle on the way there, that is.

MySpace isn’t even good at exploiting its users. That’s just downright criminal, considering that’s why it exists. At least be good at being evil, for crying out loud. Take a look at MySpace’s search engine, for instance. It’s powered by Google. Now, while I sometimes border on believing the world should be powered by Google, this is a completely senseless move for MySpace, which wants to take the video market. Google, who owns YouTube, is its direct competitor. MySpace should have its own, personalized search function and engine.

But then, it’s possible they don’t have any (real) coding experts behind the scenes to carry out such a project. It sure does appear that way.

Now, who do I have to speak to to get out of this inferno?

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openswitch » Burning in MySpace Hell » LeliaThomas.Com

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